It ain’t oRDinArY

I really cannot help but salute Tony for his entrepreneur mind.  He’s the director of Tune Ventures which in turn has a large stake in Tune Hotels and Tune Money. He is also the founder of Tune Air which holds some stake in Air Asia, a household name in Malaysia. I then saw from their Tune Group website that there are a few more names being lined up; Tune Talk, Tune Gamer, Tune Store and Tune Entertainment.

A great man like him must have given a lot of thought into his company name before starting his business. Well, branding is important and I think most of the branded names should have input from feng shui masters. Me, being a guy who is unable to employ the services of lilian or joey, must make do with some adjustments. Since Tony = Tune, I might as well use Derk = Durex Dure (pronounced ‘diu-li’)

I’ll dive into the car markets since everyone is complaining about the prices of cars in our country. I’ll use RM1 to buy over some failing car company at this economic recession, renamed it Dure and start producing a basic car. Car name = Dure Syok. My targeted market is young cantonese speaking males.

I’m targeting young people as they have less cash and are more willing to buy cheap stuff. Targeting cantonese speaking people as only they can understand the car name. And targeting males as they are more willing to buy weird stuff. This car will only have:

• 1 seat – A young male will fetch no one except a hot chick. With no passenger seat, she’ll have no reason not to sit on the lap
• no air-con – Young males tend to open their windows for smoking, wooing girls, spitting, shouting. Thus, no difference with or without air-con
• no radio – Young males will modify the cars to their own liking. And the first thing they dump out of the car is the original stereo set. So why pay for something you do not want?
• no headlights – Since drivers nowadays do not switch on their headlights but foglights, only foglights will be installed
• no wipers – Save on wiper blades. Since the window is open all of the time, the driver can use his hand to clear it during rainy days.
• no turn signal lights – You do not need something you do not use

If you think there is no other possible way to make a car cheaper than this, I’ll throw in some extra discounts if you’re willing to make the car a mobile advertisement board. Your whole car will have sponsor advertisements painted all over. These adverts will be updated during every car service. So, you’ll have a new paint job everytime you come to my Dure Service Centre.

Sounds Good? Why wait? Buy a Dure Syok today. Now, everyone can drive!